Modern Rock Tracks No. 1s - Jane's Addiction and "Been Caught Stealing"

Jane's Addiction celebrates the madcap hilarity of youthful transgressions, while your Chart Chat author grapples with yet another lyrical fumble

Jane’s Addiction - “Been Caught Stealing”

Weeks atop the Billboard Modern Rock Tracks chart: 4 total weeks (October 27 and November 24 to December 8, 1990)

Billboard Hot 100 chart toppers during this time:

• Janet Jackson - “Black Cat” (10/27/1990)

• Mariah Carey - “Love Takes Time” (11/24/90, 3 total weeks)

• Whitney Houston - “I’m Your Baby Tonight” (12/1/90)

• Stevie B - “Because I Love You (The Postman Song)” (12/8/90)

Here’s the thing: I love to sing songs. I’m a terrible singer, though; for reasons that escape me, even though I have a naturally deep voice, I tend to want to sing at a higher key. I’d hate for any of you to have to witness my ridiculous attempts to sing “I Believe In A Thing Called Love” by The Darkness, for example, because what I attempt does not do justice to the impressive octave range of lead singer Justin Hawkins. It’s the kind of thing that would cause drinking glasses to explode in old Warner Bros. cartoons.

Here’s the other thing: I’m terrible at deciphering lyrics in songs. I own the fact that I generally don’t pay attention to the lyrics or the meaning behind them in the songs that I love. For me, if it’s a good song and I can sing along, I don’t really care what the lyrics are, and they don’t even register in my brain as words. It’s like the vocalist is simply another musical instrument, and singing the words is not any different than, say, vocally imitating a guitar chord or a drum beat.

With that in mind, it’s easy for me to simply sing what my brain thinks is correct, even if it doesn’t make sense lyrically. A classic example: For years, I assumed the dove in “Edge of Seventeen” had one wing. I was never sure why Stevie Nicks would bring that particular imagery to life, but obviously I was wrong: the dove, in fact, has two wings, and they are white. When Filter got all emotionally introspective in “Take A Picture,” I thought lead singer Richard Patrick was saying “I feel like a new boy” instead of “newborn.” That’s not even one of the most common misheard lyrics in the song, and yet I found a new way to butcher it, even though I confidently sang it during its popular heyday in the late ‘90s and early ‘00s.

Take a band whose lead singers aren’t as crystal-clear vocally as Stevie Nicks and Richard Patrick, and those lyrical mistakes get amplified. I’m not sure what I thought Rancid was doing with all those black hats and Cadillacs “before the time bomb.” Many years after the release of their ‘90s classic “Time Bomb,” I discovered they were talking about how a “boy’s a time bomb,” referring to how he looks with dapper clothing and a stylish car, though sadly ill-gotten due to a meteoric rise as a gang member. If you really paid attention, you’d know the unfortunate ending of the song’s story arc, but for me it was just unintelligible garbles that I’d grunt equally unintelligibly.

All of this leads me to Jane’s Addiction’s second Modern Rock Tracks chart topper, an upbeat ditty about the adolescent joy of stealing things just for shits and giggles: “Been Caught Stealing.”

“Been Caught Stealing” is one of the first alternative hits I can recall in regular rotation on my local college radio station, the one I would eventually destroy with my on-air partner during the late ‘90s. So it’s safe to say that I’ve known of this song since at least 1991, a span of 32 years. This week was the first time I took the time to look up the lyrics.

I swear to you, for all that time, I thought Jane’s Addiction was stealing a product called “Thin Man.” I’m not even sure what I thought “Thin Man” was, but it was clear the band wanted it, and they don’t want to pay for it. In my mind, I assumed it was a brand of cigarette. Maybe it was some kind of chewing gum or beef jerky, something relatively low key you could steal on occasion when you were jonesing for it.

Nope. The lyric goes: “When I want something, man, I don’t want to pay for it.”

(Come to think of it, the refrain does change from “I” to “she” to “we,” and it seems weird that everyone wants some “Thin Man.” I should have noted that somewhere along the way. Ah well.)

Granted, I didn’t even try to guess what Perry Farrell was singing half the time, and I’m not alone in my confusion. It’s weirdly unintelligible, and in fairness, even the aforementioned “Thin Man” is an easy mistake to make because of the unusual stress on the second syllable of “something.” I didn’t realize that his girl grabbed a razor for him. I didn’t realize they sat and waved them into the air, though even if I realized it, I’m not sure what they’re waving. Their hands? The stuff they stole? It’s confusing even when you make sense of it.

The part I did understand: “La-la-la-la-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah, Dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah.” It might be my favorite part of the song.

All of this is not meant to take away from the greatness of the song. The album “Ritual de lo Habitual” is pretty solid from start to finish, and given my surprisingly strong love of first single “Stop!,” I’m not surprised that “Been Caught Stealing” is still a track I hold near and dear to my heart. The guitar intro pops right from the outset, with the barking dogs leading into Farrell’s blaring vocals. And it’s a fine rock song, which in retrospect set the stage for so much of the alternative rock jams that would come after it.

But the best part of the song is the “I don’t give a crap” attitude, the idea that they know stealing is wrong but they’ll do it anyway, because why not? They just walk right through the door, take it, and sit around their loot and laugh together. It’s youth being stupid for youth’s sake, and while the band comes off sounding like a bunch of criminal punks, it’s also a celebration of being a kid and doing stupid stuff just because you can.

This song had a weird stretch in the top spot on the MRT chart. It first broke through at #1 on Oct. 27, 1990, for a one-week run that was interrupted for three weeks by The Replacements and “Merry Go Round.” Surprisingly, “Been Caught Stealing” had enough juice left on alternative radio that it managed to climb back up to #1 and hold it for three more weeks, beginning around Thanksgiving 1990 and leading right into Christmas. I’m not sure if there was a spike in holiday shopping theft as a result of Jane’s Addiction, but I’d bet it might have influenced a few young hoodlums to try their luck.

The band broke up not long after this track hit its commercial peak. The final single to be released from “Ritual,” the mellow “Classic Girl,” peaked at #15 on the MRT chart. They would release a handful of compilation and live albums after their breakup in 1991, but would reform in 2003 for another studio performance. The first single from that album will be the subject of a Chart Chat review in a couple of years.

Until then, if you need me, I’m going to find some Thin Man. I’ll probably pay for it, though.

(Author’s note: After writing this, I did discover that Thin Man Brewery exists, and is based in Buffalo, N.Y. Since they were established in 2016, I’m sure Jane’s Addiction wouldn’t have been pilfering beers from this place. I didn’t realize they made the beer called “Trial By Wombat,” but I do see this unique can at my local grocery store every now and then, and think about getting it. I might have to now!)

Rating: 8/10

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Chart Check: A look at other notable MRT chart songs from this time period

So many of these tracks fit comfortably in a time and place where Jane’s Addiction is ruling the roost, even when the songs feel as much as part of the hard-rock ‘80s as the alt-rock ‘90s.

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“Don’t Ask Me” by Public Image Ltd.: Johnny Rotten’s post-Pistols band is back near the top of the MRT chart with this track, a bouncy and vocally interesting mix called “Don’t Ask Me.” I don’t like it nearly as much as I did “Disappointed,” the band’s only MRT chart topper, but audiences at the time still craved more Johnny Rotten, and that airplay love got this track all the way to a peak of #2 behind “Been Caught Stealing.”

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“Celebrate” by An Emotional Fish: An Emotional Fish didn’t make a lot of waves in the U.S. The band was quite successful in their native Ireland, managing seven top-40 chart hits on the Irish charts, but this would serve as their high-water mark in the States. “Celebrate” is a solid alt-rock track, and succeeded in getting all the way up to #4 behind Jane’s Addiction.

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“The Road” by The Alarm: Welsh rockers The Alarm charted in the top 10 in the U.S. MRT chart with “The Road.” This song is one that got lost in the decade switchover, as it feels like a standout ‘80s rock hit that slipped into the ‘90s accidentally. Wherever it fits thematically, it pulled off a #7 peak on the MRT charts.

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“Disappear” by INXS: The guys from INXS continued their early ‘90s domination with the second single off “X,” the album that spawned their first MRT chart topper, “Suicide Blonde.” This track struck a similar in-your-face tone and style, and managed a solid #10 peak on the MRT chart, as well as a #9 performance on the mainstream Hot 100. INXS will continue its presence on the MRT chart well into the ‘90s, and we’ll likely see them in this space many more times over the coming weeks and months.

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